If you remember last time, I briskly talked about how different silly people can be the death of you. So you’re here, and you’ve given me a few more dollars because you’re one curious little cat aren’t you? Anyway, that’s not my place to comment. You gave me your money, and now I’m in service to you. So...stupid people. Right, if you’re one of them, I advise you stop listening to me and first go rethink your life-decisions. If not, you’ve come to the right place.

Now these people aren’t any different from us. No, they don’t have an extra hand, nor do they have an extra eye, or a leg, they’re just like us...At least with the way they look. Their actions whereas...Oh, oh oh. Now the five on top of my list are:

• The noisy ones: Of course, who could overlook them? If you’re walking through the canyons, which is by the way, an Outlaw infestation in itself, and you have a companion with you who is extremely chatty and cannot shut up for good, you’ll attract attention and not live to see another day. Better be wary of these people. They’re a risk to you, and your life. Thankfully, you can evade them by simply not being their friend anymore. You’ll thank me later for this.


• The quiet ones: Well, these are a threat too, surprisingly. Now, back to the previous situation, you have an encounter with an Outlaw in the canyons when you’re on your way to the next town, when the quiet one is questioned, “Where do you think you’re going?” Now, them being the kind of people they are, expect the silence to be deafening with them. The Outlaw says, “You think of yourself too highly to talk to me?” Of course, by this point it’ll be too late to say otherwise...So take care and make them talk whenever the time is right.


• The drinkers: Oh boy, these are the ones that I’m completely affirmative of, when I begin speaking of it. Now, now, nobody refuses a good drink, since a drink is usually accompanied by deep conversations and an intriguing streak to it. But when people are drunk, they act in the most unpredictable ways. Now they might think it’s wise to challenge a sharpshooter to a duel just to keep up with their standards and definitely live to see another day (?), or to get on the table of the Saloon and make an important decision while screaming their heads off, but the next morning, they remember nothing about it. Now this is the West and I know keeping you away from a drink would be a HUGE task. So just be moderate about the ordeal, yes? Yes.


• Know-it-alls: Now I know what you’re thinking, nobody can be a ‘know-it-all’. If there is, that has to be the Religion Instructor, and I don’t think she wouldn’t get you killed, she’s a very pleasant woman, scary albeit, but passable. But there are others, while they may not be present in our town just yet, you should be wary of them. These people are outrageously smart and that wouldn’t sit right with some people, challenging you as well, who is the friend of the know-it-all. And naturally you’re not half as smart as your big-brained buddy there. So you best make a run for the hills or steer clear of the very smart ones. I’m not the one who makes the rules, man.


• Dreamers: If you dream of things in the West, you’re a fool, and fools don’t stay alive for long. Ambitions are all fine, like wanting some good wine at the end of the day, I don’t know. Or maybe finally seeing the girl you saw years ago once again, that’s what I call ambition. You wish for something that is beyond understanding, people will think hard. And they don’t like thinking hard if there is no outcome at the end of it. So they’ll question you, and if they can’t understand your answers, sorry to say, it’s easier to put a bullet in your gut.

So by now I hope you get my point, everyone is a threat to you at the end of the day. Stay wary, stay alive, and I’ll see you next time, in these few dollars, this is ALL you’ll get.